The great creative act: Forgiveness

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People often don’t understand what is involved in forgiving. They think that if somebody does something wrong, and you forgive them, that is like saying that it was alright to do it that time – but don’t dare do it again. But life doesn’t work that way; and it’s stupid or hypocritical to forgive someone on that basis. If somebody does something, you can be sure that he or she will do it again.

That is why I prefer to talk about ‘making space’ and ‘completion.’ To the extent that forgiveness is involved, it is more like self-forgiving and self-acceptance. When you forgive yourself for something, you have to create the space for that thing to exist. For whatever you resist, and fail to make space for, will indeed manifest itself in you.

Self-forgiving, and self-accepting, is an essential part of being complete in relationships. If there is something about your past that you are ashamed of, or guilty about – if there is something in it that you are hanging on to – if there is something there that you are using to burden another person – that will prevent you from being complete in your relationships.

In order to transcend having to be any particular type of person, you have to make it all right with yourself to be that type of person. The moment when you really experience that you have created yourself being whatever way you are, at the same moment you will never have to be that way again.

This self-forgiving, self-acceptance, goes hand in hand with forgiving others, making space for others, completing your relationships with others. You cannot be complete in a relationship with any person whom you do not admire and respect as he or she is, and as he or she is not – rather than the way you think she is or would like her to be. Love for a person is acceptance of him or her the way he is and the way he is not.

So long as you do not know who you really are, this will be difficult. You may have to give up a lot of things to which you may be attached. You may have to give up your resentments, your anger, your upset, your annoyance, your desire to punish.

~ Werner Erhard

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Image: Zhang Xiao from the book, Shanxi; courtesy The Guardian

Transformation

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Transformation is the context in which transformation can occur. The experience of that transformation is one of wholeness and completeness, of self as totally fulfilled and completely satisfied to be. Transformation is not a peak experience. Transformation is not the experience of self. Transformation is the self itself. If you listen carefully to what I just said, not with your understanding, but with your self, you will hear that what I just said is that transformation is completion. Transformation is being complete. What is the chair as chair? It’s complete. What is the room as room? It’s complete. What is the self as self? It’s complete. It is the complete self, simply being self.

The dictionary has a beautifully abstract definition of complete. It’s beautifully contextual. It says “complete implies the inclusion of all that is needed for the integrity, perfection or fulfillment” of something.

That captures my meaning exactly. When self is self, that is the experience of being complete. That is the experience of integrity, or being true to yourself.

~ Werner Erhard

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Image:  Zhang Xiao from the book, Shanxi; courtesy The Guardian

“Could I mean that much to you?”

The following is an excerpt of a post from 2012 containing a favourite anecdote from The Art of Possibility by Rosamund Stone Zander and Benjamin Zander.

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A monastery had fallen on hard times. It was once part of a great order which, as a result of religious persecution … lost all its branches. It was decimated to the extent that there were only five monks left in the mother house: the Abbot and four others, all of whom were over seventy. Clearly it was a dying order.

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Life-giving Turmoil – A Sermon for the Sunday of the Passion: Palm Sunday, Matthew 21:1-11

solidgoldcreativity:

Here is Father Mike speaking of the Holy Week. In Australia, we’re well into Wednesday, the day Judas, the betrayer in all of us, does his deed …

Originally posted on Interrupting the Silence:

Triumphal Entry, Icon, Palm Sunday, Sunday of the Passion, Matthew 21:1-11, Matthew 27:11-54, Sermon, Turmoil, Earthquake, Holy Week

Icon of the Triumphal Entry ( source )

Today is known as the Sunday of the Passion: Palm Sunday. (There are two gospel readings: Matthew 21:1-11 (the triumphal entry) and Matthew 27:11-54 (the passion)). I’ve been wondering and thinking though about a different name for this day. What if we renamed today “Turmoil Sunday?” Does that sound like the gospel to you? Did you show up today hoping or expecting Jesus to bring some turmoil? Is the turmoil bringing Jesus the one you want to know and follow?

My guess is that, for most of us, the answers to those questions are, “No, no,” and “no.” I can honestly say that I have never prayed for Jesus to bring me some turmoil and I’m betting most of you haven’t either. Most of us probably pray for and hope Jesus will bring just the opposite: some peace and calm, answers to…

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The only thing there is to do today

“The only thing you are going to do today is: what you do today. Therefore, the only thing there is to do today is: what you do today. That’s all there was to do when you started no matter what you thought or think.

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Feather woman

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My Landmark buddies and me invent possibilities. They are possibilities for being. Sometimes, the possibility stays in existence for days or hours, others stay in existence for years. The possibility of being joy that I created in 2008 still moves me to this day.

I saw C, she of the 64 years, according to her birth certificate, the other night. She was wearing a skin tight, lime green mini-dress and long feather earrings like Pocahontas. She was lit up, magnetic, a leader. We wanted to be near her, to hear a word from her for us.

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Working with others: Respect and Admiration

“I could always tell when an organisation was in good shape. I could tell because the manager of the organisation would always be talking about how great the people in the organisation were. If the manager was talking about anything other than how great people in the organisation were, I knew that the organisation was in bad shape. The way to manage an organisation successfully is to manage it in such a way that you can be proud of the people with whom you are working. You have to find a way to interact with the people with whom you are working in a way that makes you proud of them.

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Love is …

My cousin, Helen, told me a good story about her granddaughter, Scarlet.

Scarlet is eight years old and an extraordinary child. People gasp at her beauty, and she has phenomenal poise and confidence. When I was remarking on it, as everyone does, Helen told me about an incident that occurred when Scarlet was four.

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Be listened as you’ve never been listened before

You are invited as my guest this Wednesday evening to the final session of my Sex and Intimacy seminar with Landmark. The magnificent Anne-Marie Brown is leading the guest event. She’s led to over 10,000 people and is a master at putting people at ease and hearing their greatness. You’ve never been listened until you’ve been listened by Anne-Marie.

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Walt Whitman Bursts Into Song Concerning the Civic Debate over Jets at Toronto Island Airport

solidgoldcreativity:

Steven McCabe is making magic again …

Originally posted on poemimage:

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Come said the Muse,

  Sing me a song no poet yet has chanted,

  Sing me the universal.

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 In this broad earth of ours,

  Amid the measureless grossness and the slag,

  Enclosed and safe within its central heart,

  Nestles the seed perfection.

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  By every life a share or more or less,

  None born but it is born, conceal’d or unconceal’d the seed is waiting.

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  Lo! keen-eyed towering science,

  As from tall peaks the modern overlooking,

  Successive absolute fiats issuing.

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  Yet again, lo! the soul, above all science,

  For it has history gather’d like husks around the globe,

  For it the entire star-myriads roll through the sky.

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 In spiral routes by long detours,

  (As a much-tacking ship upon the sea,)

  For it the partial to the permanent flowing,

  For it the real to the ideal tends.

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  For it the…

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Love letter to Melbourne

The years leading up to 1891 were very good ones for Melbourne. The gold rush of the 1850s had seen people flock to the city from all over the world. For a time, it was the second-largest city in the British Empire, after London, and one of the wealthiest. Even now, 120 years later, you can see gold in suburban streets such as this one above, a street in Clifton Hill.

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