For Aussie readers: GAME ØF TØNES



My friend, Steve Jasper, writes a column on Facebook called Game of Tones, about you-know-who.

He thought it was time to hang up the quill, but lo …

Here’s his latest instalment, the best yet.


And now, it’s time for another episode of …


Stonus Abbottheon was dead. Dead, buried and cremated. Copperwire had roundly defeated him, and gone to fight for the Six Kingdoms (and Two Territories), where he had defeated Ser Bill Shaftem by the narrowest of margins, with many from the House of Libberster dead. (Goodbye Bronwyn. Goodbye! Bronwyn, Bronwyn, Bronwyn, goodbye! Toodle pip!).

But Copperwire’s biggest danger was not from Ser Bill Shaftem and his army – although they *were* a constant thorn in his side – but from his own right flank, who questioned the legitimacy of his rule. Every. F*cking. Minute. And who raised stupid questions about plebiscites, and Muslims, and halal hamburgers and safe schools and whatnot.

At least Stonus Abbottheon was dead. Dead, buried and cremated.

Or was he?

There had been some frightening reports of Stonus’ corpse seen to be animated in the nation of his birth, Bleak Island. Rumours grew louder. Had Stonus become … a bluetiewalker? The prospect was too frightening to contemplate. And would Ser Grecian2000 make another tilt at deputy? (Probably.)

The turmoil around the Krudd / Red Queen years seemed inevitably to be replayed, with Copperwire doomed within a year. Only time would tell …



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